This past weekend, Saturday, Christine and I joined Hope and the Wonder Boys, Nathan and James, for their season finale. It was the big day for them and their respective football teams. Both Nathan and James faithfully attended each practice and every weekend game. Some of the games were not close by but Hope made sure the boys were there to be a part of their teams.
Well Saturday, the big day, arrived and with it the Championship games! Here is how it worked out. The teams were scheduled to play until they lost. The winning team went on to the final game, the championship game! As it turned out Nathan’s team lost their game that would have put them in the final game against James’ team. James team played against another team.
The big game was scheduled to go 30 minutes. At first I didn’t pick up on the fact that the coaches, that would be the adults, wanted to win this game come hell or high water. But it became apparent as the game unfolded. James coach used his premier players for both offense and defense. In doing this he left about 4 of the boys on the sideline, including James, faithful, hopeful, James. The coach didn’t use James or the other three boys at all! Imagine being six years old and getting psyched up for this game and not being allowed to play even one down, not one! I watch James go up and down the field following his team as they played. Several times I thought his coach would send him in for a play or two. He didn’t.
Look, listen to me, I understand the concept of winning and losing. I know why a score is kept. Life has winners and losers. But sometimes losing a game of football can make you a real winner in life. How is that? Simple, the real lesson here, at the big game, for six year old boys, wasn’t just winning, but competing, trying to win, helping your team! James, and the other little boys, were denied their moment to shine, to be a part of the team they had supported throughout the season. They were denied that “earned” opportunity because a coach chose to use his “best” players so that he could win the game! What an unspoken message this coach sent to these little boys; “you’re not good enough”, “winning is everything.”
I thought that good sportsmanship and learning “team” concepts was important at this age level. Apparently it wasn’t. For the coach it was all about winning.
Winning isn’t everything. Sometimes“what” you have won isn’t worth “what” you have lost. “What does it gain a man if he gains the whole world and loses…….”
My grandson may not have been the “best” player on the field with the greatest skills but I guarantee that James has as much “heart” as any player on his team. He wanted to be there, to play, to try.
It is true, the coach did use his best players that day, Saturday, but those boys didn’t have the best coach that day.
They lost despite his decision to use his “best” and bench the rest.
Shame on him.
Hal
December 6, 2011 at 2:34 pm |
I agree “Shame on Him”. It is so important for little children to ALL be included so they can do their best and be part of their “team”. You have many words of wisdom. Doesn’t it hurt us adults to see our little children hurt! What compassion you have. Your children and grandchildren are winners already having a Grandpa [or whatever they call you] on their side. Be blessed.